A couple weeks ago, Shaughn and I watched our nieces for an afternoon. After playing soccer in high heels and generally wearing myself out, the seven year old asked me to battle with her pokemon cards. I have tried to do this one other time and it made absolutely no sense. Basically I asked her how to do everything and then after some cards were flipped and she mentioned something about powers and damage she loudly declared that she was the winner. And I would say, "What? You cheated!"

Wanting to avoid another proud moment of me calling a seven year old a cheater, I told her I needed to learn to play. So while I dozed on the couch she went through a tutorial online telling me to pay attention. And then we played, this time with me asking more pertinent questions than "Is it my turn?" It was actually pretty fun.

The next time I saw her I asked if she wanted to play again and we played several more games, this time with her older sister helping me. She won every game. Her big sister called her a big cheater. I lamented that I wanted my own cards and the said we should just go down to Fred Meyer and get some. I told her I didn't have very much money in my budget to spend on cards. I asked her what I could get for $7 and she gave me a "uhh....not much" look. Then she told me she could pay the extra $5 it would take. When I explained that that was very sweet but I couldn't take her money she said, "What is a stupid budget, ANYway?" 

Our budget is stupid. Looking for a job outside of childcare has been so demoralizing. I apply and apply and two weeks later I get an email that says thanks but no thanks. The highs and lows of applying is so intense. On one hand, when I apply to a position, I have to display this increased sense of self and my abilities and really let my confidence shine. But then when I don't get the job I plummet into self-loathing. It's totally exhausting. Meanwhile our budget is snug. I don't want to whine about this too much because we have a house to live in, a beautiful garden, family, friends, food, a car and a ping pong table. We're fine. But it's a little uncomfortable. I'm exceedingly proud of how we have stuck to our budget and am excited that this stripping down to the essentials will make us better savers in the future, better consumers. But honestly, our budget is stupid.

So after explaining what a stupid budget is I asked if she just wanted to play a few more games with her cards. She sighed and said sure but that if she won I would have to take her money. God she's bossy. She did, in fact, win the next 4 games. But fortunately, I also remembered I had $10 of quarters in my change purse, so she and I went down to Fred Meyer and she helped me buy my own Pokemon cards. It was pretty awesome. And I've won two games since then. 


  1. Ugh, job searching is such a pain, and I always found myself frustrated that the associated expenses can be painful (the right clothes, shoes, bag, so you look professional and like you don't actually need this job!).

    When I've interviewed people in the past, I've been surprised at how often things that were very specific to our needs made us pass up very good candidates. I've always wanted to tell them "you were awesome, we just needed (insert random ridiculous need they could never have anticipated)."

    But somehow, knowing that only helps me a very tiny amount when I'm job searching and feeling that rejection personally. :(


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